Plug In

I’ve been on social networking sites since early 2001…and what motivated me to start WhyGoSolo is the desire to interact with people in real life.  But here is the thing, it’s not just me…humans at the core of their beings are looking for companionship and interaction with other human beings.  I guess I could dig up a bunch of research on the web and link to them to prove my point or you can just take a deep look into yourself and realize I’m right.

Social networks have played a big part in making people feel like they were interacting together…the sites like MySpace, Facebook, Bebo, Hi5 and so on.  However, what’s happening on those sites besides the build up of useless applications is a decrease in the actual feeling of interacting with friends and other people.

I see Facebook as a big message board and extension to my email contact list – that’s about it.  It’s a place to pass information and check-out information.  Not much real interaction happening.  And the numbers will keep reflecting that…like noted and depicted in a few nice charts available by Business Week’s Spencer Ante on his blog.

This certainly doesn’t doom all social networks or social networking.  It just means that people need a better “fix”…a stronger dose of what they are looking for INTERACTION!!

My prediction is this – as far as online interaction goes – sites like Pownce, Twitter, and Seesmic are the next big trend and where the future growth of users and interaction will happen.  People will shift more and more to those types of sites because the interaction is “live”.  The interaction is immediate; it’s more fun, interesting and able to create deeper connections.

The next trend in my humble opinion is of course sites like WhyGoSolo…which is about making real world connections. The easier, quicker and simpler we can make that happen the better.

Now, here is the bonus though to sites like WhyGoSolo…and yes, I’m tooting my own horn.  Our members are active in doing things…and we will know what they love to do and are looking to do.  What does that mean?  I means that for organizations, businesses, venues, restaurants etc. who want to interact with those members, they’ll be able to.  Whether it’s through the site, mobile phone or other means…by offering discounts and incentives they can work to truly cooperate  and connect with their perfect audience.  This creates real win-win situations for the consumers and the vendors. 

Sites that don’t offer real value or what their members are actually look for aren’t going to be able to keep going as we move forward because the novelty has finally worn off. 

Most cool features or applications in the long run don’t fill the void for real human needs.

Who doesn’t love some stand-up comedy!?!?  It’s a guaranteed adventure!!

We have a free pass for two for the Bethesda Hyatt Saturday Nite Comedy Show.  The passes are good for any Saturday night in February…so pick a Saturday, create your listing and find someone to join you!!

The show is from 8pm-10pm and according to the passes you need to be at the Hyatt Regency Hotel, One Metro Center, 7400 Wisconsin Ave., Bethesda MD. by 7:15pm.

After every show, audience members have a chance to win the highly coveted "I was very brave" sticker, $25 cash, a free beer and 2 tickets to a future Saturday show at the Bethesda, MD Hyatt Regency Hotel by participating in our “Everybody’s A Comedian™" joke contest.  Get up on stage and tell one brief joke – any joke, internet joke, knock knock joke, passed down through your family from your great uncle joke… please, no long stories. 

Winners are selected by audience applause... So bring your family, friends, neighbors and co-workers… and tell them to bring family, friends, neighbors and co-workers… Good Luck!

For more information on the show and who the comedians are check out the StandupComedyToGo website. 

Remember…once you have a planned listing with someone email us at contests@whygosolo.com and we’ll get the passes to you.

StandupComedyToGo also puts on open mic free shows on Thursdays at Dupont Circle at Topaz.

I’m very excited to announce a really fun way we are going to serve you our members!! It’s time to really keep a close eye on the blog so you don’t miss out on your chance to go do something fun and meet some cool new people.

Here’s how it works and what’s happening…we are contacting local (DC area for now) venues, restaurants and organizations to take part in donating a pair of tickets for you guys, our members to win. 

How do you win?

Glad you asked!  You win by being first to find someone to join you.  Once we announce the tickets/event…be first to create a listing for it and complete a Handshake with someone else.  Once you have a listing for the event in the planned status…email us at contests@whygosolo.com or leave a comment on the blog post announcing the tickets.  We will contact the winners immediately and let you know where to pickup your tickets. 

How to Create Your Listing?

Creating a listing is very easy. Login to your profile, go to Community Listings on your sub-navigation bar and click on Create Listing.  Fill out the info and post. 

Reminder on the Handshake Process:

When you initiate a Handshake a private message is sent to the person who created the listing and they can Accept or they can Pass.  If the person Passes…it’s over.  If a person Accepts…the Handshake is not yet completed.  Both parties still have to confirm the other person’s interest. 

So it’s like this…I initiate a Handshake with Bob.  Bob Accepts and it’s sent back to me.  I acknowledge that Bob gave me the thumbs-up and Bob closes it out with a final approval.  Done…community listing is moved to planned status. 

Good Luck!! 

Stay tune for the announcement of our first pair of tickets…that’s my next post.  We’ve got tickets for the Bethesda Hyatt Saturday Nite Comedy Show!

Woohoo!!  We have our shinny new homepage up!!  No more invites.  You can now signup from the homepage (still need to validate your email address before setting up your profile though).

We’ve worked through the bugs we found since the launch on January 5^th so now we are opening things up a little more.  We are constantly working to improve the features we have and working to add new ones, but the site is pointless without people on it and using it, so we wanted to make it easier to signup and check out what’s happening.

Now that we have a new homepage non-members can see your profile page and community listings.  If you don’t want your profile to be public be sure to log in, go to settings and change your preferences from public to either friends only or user (member) only.  

We’ve also tweaked a few of the features: added marital status and location to profiles, enabled the expiration system on the community listings, updated the status of listings and made some other tweaks that are not very obvious to the “naked eye”.

We already know we desperately need a search feature/search options and that will be forthcoming in the next few weeks. 

We appreciate your patience…not to beat a dead horse since most of you already know we are only self-funded and the development is happening during our dedicated teams’ free time, so we are doing as much as we can with what’s at our disposal.

On that note, let me tell you what’s on our list for the next few weeks:

1. Some additional tweaks on the current features – again this won’t be very obvious to most but it’s needed. What you will notice is the Flake Out Score System.  I’ll explain more once we put it online.
2. On Saturday we’ll upgrade to Rails 1.2.6. After which we’ll need to keep an eye out on what might blow up on us for a week or so…this is in preparation to make the next upgrade to Rails 2.0.2.
3. And that’s the next thing we’ll do – Upgrade to Rails 2.0.2.   To most people that’s not very exciting…to the development team this is the fun stuff and it will also make their lives easier moving forward with future development.
4. In the midst of all that, is getting an initial search feature added to the site.

We’re also planning on releasing our Facebook Application once there’s a little more going on on the site.

I’ve had my fingers crossed in the hopes of getting the Coaching Corner up for weeks now…but guessing I still won’t see that come online yet; so I’ll start blogging here about some of basic things I wanted to blog about in the Coaching Corner.

I’m working on a few other things I’ll start talking about and announcing here on the blog once things are in motion and happening.

Ahhh…I gotta say, working on site, business development and team stuff is so much more enjoyable then anything dealing with fund raising!

See you on the site and out and about!!

Instead of just reading about what's going you can now watch me talk about it on Seesmic.  I've finally got my act together and did the first recordings today. 

The first one is a bit of a Wacky Intro and the second one is where I explained how I want to use Seesmic: Take 2...

Hoping to do a few videos a week.

Sorry gents…this isn’t a blog post to give you pointers on how to pick up women but none the less keep reading because you might still learn something!!

This is a blog post about what women want and how WhyGoSolo offers us that. 

I started WhyGoSolo out of a need – a need that I know others also have.  I’m an independent, focused, strong minded, driven, ambitious and goal oriented woman…my world does not revolve around a man, having a family or staying home and growing old alone.  I’m not looking for a relationship but I am looking for some great friends to hang out with.  I have some amazing friends but they have all moved away and some of my local friends don’t necessarily have the same interests or availability as I do. 

The Got it Together Chick

Many women in their late 20s and on have their lives together – good career path, solid income, stable home, and bright future.  We work hard and we aim to accomplish many things.  We learned from the sacrifices our moms made for us and their families.  We’ve been taught how to care of ourselves and we look out for ourselves.  It’s all part of being independent and living our lives the way we want to. 

Girls Just Want to Have Fun

The show Sex in the City taught us to celebrate who we are, to go out and have fun and to be there for each other.  The show revolved around all that is women and the importance and value of having reliable, fun and loyal friends.  Sex in the City made many women feel alive…and ache for some excitement in our own lives. 

Who is living up to that?  Is it easier said then done? 

The Right Match

Let's face it…finding good girlfriends is just as tough as finding a good boyfriend.  It has to be the right match but unfortunately there's no place to go to to find girlfriends to hang out with – no finding the right girlfriends through a speed dating service. 

We (women) look for different qualities in our friends…but at the end of the day we want other women in our lives who understand who we are, our dreams, passions, fears, and concerns.  Friends to share fun times, adventures, struggles and joys with.  Friends to support each other in our careers, businesses and family. Friends to take care of one another and raise to the top with.

Wing Women Group

When talking to other women about WhyGoSolo most women get really excited about the possibilities of meeting some new girlfriends…so to make this even easier to do I started the Wing Women Group.  http://www.whygosolo.com/groups/40

Guys are used to being each other’s wing men…time for women to join the tradition and start being each others Wing Women. 

The group is a place for women to post your listings of the things you want to do…so that ONLY women will answer your listing.  Once we add the forums to groups it will be a wonderful place to have discussions and support for each other.

Eventually we’ll want to create Wing Women groups for each cities…but this is a good start.  Anyone reading this who would like to do the logo for the our Wing Women group that would be really appreciated. I was thinking gold wings and diamonds!! But I’m open to other ideas.

This is the place to find some amazing new girlfriends!!

I can’t afford to use my own site.  It’s best to laugh at the irony of it rather then well..cry.  I imagined that once I had WhyGoSolo going out would be blast because I would be able to find some great new people to do all the things I’ve been putting off doing since I didn’t want to do them alone.

The plan was that as soon as the site was up I would buy pairs of tickets to some of the events going on around town and post listings for each of them offering the other ticket for free as a way to promote the site and have some fun.  Instead of being able to do that I’m on the complete opposite end of the spectrum and I can’t afford to do anything at all.  Can’t buy tickets, can’t go out to eat, can’t even spend the money on the gas to get places. 

So when I had the money there was no WhyGoSolo…now that I have WhyGoSolo I have no money.  Go figure, right!?!?  I really hope that eventually both will line up together.

I haven’t blogged in over a week because I can’t fake making things sound nice and peachy when they’re not.  I’d wager to say that all entrepreneurs know about the real dark sides and low points of being an entrepreneur…particularly the dark side of being a completely broke entrepreneur with a mortgage, responsibilities and people awaiting your next move.

They’re not pretty and when in the midst of them you don’t feel very sociable, friendly or in the mood to encourage anyone else to embark on the hellish journey you’re on.  You also realize that no one wants to hear about the downsides or true harsh difficulties of being an entrepreneur so I skip blogging during those times. 

On the brighter side of things…those very low moments open up to new perspectives, ideas and options.  The key is to not quit.  Every time a person and venture survives the low points they come out of it wiser, stronger and more determined.  Those left standing are the most dedicated, connected and the true believers. 

Truth is that through the start-up process you will question everything you are doing, why are you doing it and how the heck you let it get you to where you are now.  You have to figure out for yourself the answer to this question: What makes it worth it?

(Entrepreneurs have certain traits in common which drive us to be entrepreneurs in the first place and are part of carrying quite a load for ourselves.)

I had an IM chat with someone yesterday all the way in Sweden and somewhere in the conversation we got unto the two things that I value the most – the keys to my happiness 1) Freedom and 2) Achievements.  He then said this “in order to be free, you need to achieve - and while achieving you feel free”.

He was right on the money because the way it works is that until I begin to achieve what I set out to do…I am trapped into it.  I’m trapped in my desires to achieve and I do and focus on nothing else.  For the last year of my life it’s been solely and all on the grand vision of WhyGoSolo.  We’ve achieved a great deal but on Ann’s scale of expectations and achievements it pales to where I wanted to be. 

I’ve been beating myself up over it but it’s out of my system for now – I have new avenues of approach to focus on and things to do towards getting the bigger goals accomplished.  As long as I have a road to travel towards mission accomplishment I keep going.   

The other thing is that I don’t like being around people when I’m in a negative mindset nor am I a fan of sharing my struggles.  So if I ever do go quiet again know that I will always end up coming back to fight another round!!  It’s not winning the battles that matter it’s winning the war!!

And by coping I mean emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally with Fund Raising.  Talk to anyone who has raised or is in the process of raising funds for their start-up and they will tell you: It’s the toughest and hardest thing they have EVER done.

If you have never raised funds before then you can start by reading this previous blog post I’ve written to get a sense of what it’s like or imagine a world of empty promises, absolutely no guarantees, no set rules, no rhyme or reason for most things, and off set values.  Finally, read the following blog post that Brad Feld posted a little while ago of a very well thought-out rant about investors from an obviously well versed and savvy entrepreneur:  A Rant on VC’s, Financial Models and Experience. 

Most entrepreneurs have very clear sets of standards and rules they live by…we want to change the world in our own personal ways.  We are driven, ambitious and passionate.  We strongly believe in what we are doing and why we are doing it.  We’re always in a hurry and we believe in making things happen quickly.  We create based on innovation, ingenuity and integrity.  We see the world as a good place full of possibilities and opportunities.  We are independent, strong willed, (some more stubborn than others), risk takers and filled with hope for a making the world a better place. 

Unfortunately, entrepreneurs drastically clash with investors, particularly Venture Capitalist investors.  They deal with the bottom line…numbers $$.  Many VCs are not entrepreneurs and were never entrepreneurs…what I described above is something they just don’t know about first hand.  

Side note…in the Marine Corps enlisted Marines say that the best Officers in the Corps are former enlisted Marines—that’s because they’ve been there, they know what it’s like.

My week this week has been spent focused mostly on fund raising and it’s put me in seriously fouled mood.  I’m also on a diet—so that might also have something to do with it… 

Anyway, what I’ve come to realize is that I need to build-in ways to better cope with the fund raising process, otherwise I'll just hurt all the hard work we've accomplished. Here are the things that I will start doing and recommend anyone starting the fund raising process give it a go as well: 

Stop Reading the Negativity:  The horror stories from other entrepreneurs who have had bad experiences with investors are all over the web and very easy to find.  Blog posts and articles about VCs and their “evil” ways or frustrating methodologies are always just a mouse click away.  This type of reading does nothing to put anyone in a good mindset. 

Read Facts and the Positives: Stick to only reading the facts about fund raising, term sheets and the process to be properly educated. 

Support Group: Create a support group…your partners or other entrepreneurs who will listen to you rant but not join in.  You need a place to be able to unload and get recharged.  A handful of people or even may be just one person who reminds you of what you’ve accomplished, what you are out to change in the world and who keeps you going. 

Find What Energizes You: What’s your source of passion, energy and drive?  Find what that is and tap into it when the going gets really tough.  When I was in the Marine Corps no matter how bad things got…all I had to do was hang out with my Marines for a while and everything melted away—now, it’s the development team.  No matter how frustrated and stressed I get—they are a reminder of the good and right of all my efforts to date. 

Get a Punching Bag: Let the frustrations and aggravations out…not just verbally but physically.  May be it’s not a punching bag but going for a run, walk or workout.  Let it out...this will also help with any other stress you're dealing with.

Focus on More Then Just the Money: I know all about having a one track mind until the mission is accomplished but in the case of fund raising it’s going to kill you.  Carve out time where you are solely and only focusing on fund raising and use the remainder of the time to focus on all the other aspects of your venture you love.  Get some victories in other areas to keep you happy and motivated.

Visualize What you Want: Expand your energy on visualizing the outcomes that you are seeking and stay focused on that.  This is going to be hard, particularly if you have a biased mindset already established or have had a series of bad experiences.  Take however much time it takes to find a way to get pass the anger and frustrations and be able to visualize the results you want. 

Keep Your Mindset in Check:  It will take the a culmination of  the above to help make this happen.  The wrong mindset will hurt all your efforts and those of others helping you.  If you can’t see things in a positive light…at least set them to a neutral level. 

Stay Empowered:  What made me the most angry was that I was empowering the investors with this one thought “My dream is in their hands…to continue I need money from them”.  It is so wrong on so many levels to think that.  My dream is mine…I am the only one whose hands it’s in.  Investors or money are not in control or in charge of my dream.  The worst thing we can do to ourselves in really any situation is play the victim and give the outcome of the situation into the hands of others.  Don’t do it.

If anyone else has input or other coping methods I'd love to hear them. 

I want to thank Howard Freidman and Ric Fleisher for their help this week.  Talking with them helped me realize I really needed to create some coping mechanism, they made some good introductions for me, shared their wisdom and support which means a lot to me.

My next blog post will be on the interview I did with Julius Genachowski one the Founders of LaunchBox Digital. We talked about his vision, purpose and the offerings of LaunchBox Digital to entrepreneurs.

See you on the site and out and about!! 

A long, long time ago before I started CaseySoftware, I didn't understand the point of an introduction.  I considered it irrelevant and not all that important to day to day business, goals, or even your personal/professional standing... then I figured out how wrong I was.

An introduction to the right person at the right time under the right circumstances can be the most powerful thing in the world.  It can make or break an opportunity.  It can completely change everything in no time...

A pair of books tipped me off to this... Art of the Start and Love is the Killer App.  It may sound silly, but between these two books, I figured out the point of an introduction has nothing to do with what you can get.  It has everything to do with what you can give...  If you introduce two people with complementary goals, interests, or situations, they will be the ones to benefit.  But before anyone can benefit, you need to make the introduction worthwhile to both sides.

 So what does it take to make a good introduction?

First, you need to know both people involved.  If you don't know both of them, this isn't an introduction, it's a cold call.  Don't waste your time doing a cold call for someone else, they can do it themselves.

Second, you need to vouch for both people.  By writing the introduction, you are lending your name and credibility.. now you need to tell them why.  I make a point of telling how I know each of the people, whether we've worked or collaborated on a project, and something else that might spark their interest.

Third, there needs to be a reason for the introduction and you have to state it quickly.  Look, most of us are busy and don't have the time for a lot of irrelevant email.  Get to the point and get to it quickly.  State what each of them stand to gain from the introduction.

And finally... don't have any expectations.  Even with a personal introduction, quite often one of them won't follow up.  The opportunity might fall through.  Their goals might not line up.  Or the match might not be as good as you hoped.  Don't expect a finder's fee and don't expect the favor to be returned.

So... what's the point?  What do you stand to gain from giving introductions?

In the short term, nothing.   Most of the introductions you pass along will end right there.  A few more will trade a few emails.  And a special few will result in business or a new connection.  While I haven't tracked it, anecdotally, I suspect this is about 10%.

In the long term, everything.  What is the value of helping friends and associates succeed?  What is the value of becoming known as the "connector" in your circles?  What is the value of being contacted first when new opportunities appear?  Honestly, I can't put a value on any of these... they're that big, they're that powerful, and they have the potential to be career and life-changing to you... and the people you help.  There's no way to measure that value.